Recaps, commentary, highlights of your pop culture favourites and mine! Email me: timmybopper@yahoo.com

 
Ahh! While I have been thoroughly enjoying my American TV here in New York (namely: VH1, E! (The Entertainment Channel) and MTV), I am incredibly disappointed that without MuchMusic, I will be missing the Mary-Kate and Ashley Live @ Much show at the end of the month! I mean, sure I was disappointed to miss Paris Hilton Live @ Much and Jessica Simpson's recent appearance was really overhyped in my opinion. But to miss Mary-Kate and Ashley?! This is just the most terrible setback ever experienced in my life!!!

At least I'll have U.S. TV's oddly endearing crop of reality shows (or as VH1 tries to cleverly name is, "celebreality") to keep me entertained. Even more odd is how Omarosa manages to be on EVERY one of these shows! She's on The Surreal Life, Kill Reality (a show where ex-reality stars make a horror movie) and was in "Celebrity" Fear Factor. Clearly the woman does not realize that her 15 minutes were over a long time ago! She is not as fun to watch as she thinks she is.

What IS fun to watch, however, is Celebrity Fit Club, where fat ex-celebrities form teams and try to lose the most weight! The sight of Jackee (the mother on Sister, Sister - remember that show?) trying to do strip-aerobics is funny enough, but add in her "sista friend" black accent commentary and she is doubly hilarious! At the end of the show, they make the contestants stand in a giant scale (no, seriously) and the scale teeters back and forth until we find out which team weighs more.

I've also become addicted to Kathy Griffin's "My Life on the D-List" reality show. Basically cameras follow Kathy Griffin around and watch her make fun of celebrities. Kathy Griffin hasn't had a hit show in years, is never in US or In Touch and is about as pretty as a sack of potatoes, but yet I can't help but like her! She is really really funny and comes up with the best wisecracks, probably because what she says is so true!

Two other shows I must mention: Hogan Knows Best following Hulk Hogan's family and "Kept," which I'm not really sure what it's about. "Hogan" tries to convince us that it's a real show, but really it's just another pathetic attempt to try and give Hulk's daughter Brooke a singing career. I can't help but feel like she's doing all the WRONG things to get her career started - she signed with Lou (I swear I'm not a pedophile) Pearlman - the guy who discovered BSB and NSYNC and O-Town sure, but also the guy who BSB and NSYNC and O-Town SUED for being a shady manager! Then Brooke dated Aaron Carter. Enough said. Finally, she tried going to whole "Britney" route and slutting up her image. It would've worked better had Brooke not been a friggin' 7 feet giant weighing 200 pounds! Instead of looking like she'll pounce on you and get sexy in bed, she looks like she'll pounce on you, squish you and suffocate you to death.

Kept meanwhile, follows Jerry Hall (Mick Jagger's ex-wife) as she looks for a younger boytoy. I honestly think that's what this show is about. She goes on dates with younger men who look like they're straight (and I use that term loosely) out of an Abercrombie ad and then chooses one of them to be her "kept man." Ridiculous premise but so good to watch! It's basically a bunch of good looking guys WHORE-ing themselves out to an older woman! And the prize? No money, no record contract, no trip but just the chance to stand beside Jerry Hall and go out on the town with her. Can you say cougar?

Many more American shows to discuss, but now is not the time. Rather, I must search my piles of stuff, dig up my old Mary-Kate and Ashley calendar and have a quiet time to mourn while watching Full House reruns on TV.
posted by Tim at 2:12 PM